Wednesday 18 April 2012

Spam Comments On Blogger




A while back I showed you a window into the strange, perhaps surreal, world of the FLSC or ‘foreign language spam comment’. Well thank goodness not everything has been outsourced to China. High weirdness is still available, hand crafted in English. I found this in the moderation queue the other morning


7:05p Had a group of white kids come up to me and ask me to buy a bottle. Suggest I will be attacked in the near future. I will be ready with the sizzors and I will go for the eyes. Please make them white males. The gods are fucking monsters. Let me share with you some of the monsterous things they have done in the recent past:::: 1. Treat Blvd. killings. Saw a beautiful therapist I recently brought up again. The gods had some delinquent white male plow his SUV into an Afghan man and his 9 year old daughter on a Saturday morning ride right in front of the building after I "foreshadowed" the event, killing them both. 2. Discussed Haitian child slavery problem. Had a slavery issue in my family, perpetuated from parents into the next generation. Considered a parent's possible reincarnation as a Haitian child slave. Shortly thereafter 25,000 dead in 2009 earthquake. 3. Badmouth crappy Chilean fruit. 2009 Earthquake. 4. 2002 Cozumel vacation. Wilma parks on the prime diving area on

But wait there’s more, the next day there was a second helping

7:05p Had staged incident where a group of white kids come up to me and ask me to buy a bottle. Suggest I will be attacked in the near future. The gods are fucking monsters. Let me share with you some of the monsterous things they have done in the recent past:::: 1. Treat Blvd. killings. Saw a beautiful therapist I recently brought up again. The gods had some delinquent white male plow his SUV into an Afghan man and his 9 year old daughter on a Saturday morning ride right in front of the building after I "foreshadowed" the event, killing them both. 2. Discussed Haitian child slavery problem. Had a slavery issue in my family, perpetuated from parents into the next generation. Considered a parent's possible reincarnation as a Haitian child slave. Shortly thereafter 25,000 dead in 2009 earthquake. 3. Badmouth crappy Chilean fruit. 2009 Earthquake. 4. 2002 Cozumel vacation. Wilma parks on the prime diving area (SW) of the island and hammers the reefs for 40 full hours. 5. on


I am actually offering a prize for the best explanation of what this may or may not mean. Not sure what the prize is, or when the closing date for entries is, but I think we can all rest easy knowing that fact is stranger than fiction

Your pal
SBW [the B is for baffled]


Picture credit Eat4fun